Young But Mature: I Say Congrats To Millie Bobby Brown And Jake Bongiovi!

So many people seem to have strong opinions about Millie Bobby Brown and Jake Bongiovi getting engaged. Comments on both their Instagram posts, that appear to be subtle engagement announcements, are a mixed bag between congratulatory messages and people saying they are too young to get married. 

While it doesn’t seem that either one of them have officially announced anything, the photos they have shared on social media tell the story of a happy engagement. So why are so many people commenting negatively about it? 

Someone recently asked me what I think about it from a mother’s perspective because I have three boys around their ages. My oldest boy, 20, is actually engaged to his girlfriend who is 18, so I guess asking my opinion seems valid in some way. 

My son has been dating his fiance for about three years. They got engaged a few months ago, despite their young ages, but they don’t plan to actually get married until late next year.

I’m sure you’re wondering how everyone in the family reacted to that news. Calmly, that’s how. No one got upset or crazed over it, because at the end of the day, we know they are as solid as a relationship can be and it’s their life to live. Do I think they are making a mistake? Not at all. I'm happy for their happiness and excited for their future together. 

When it comes to Brown, she’s been an actress since a young age. I think a lot of people miss the fact that being a child actor means you mature much faster. My youngest son was a child actor from the age of 7 until he was 14. He’s not someone you would know just by hearing his name, Jesse VanDerveer, or by looking at his picture, but he lived that life for seven years of his childhood.

I watched him mature faster than many kids his age because he already had a strong work ethic going on. He was dealing with more adult-type material such as crime on “Law & Order: SVU” and legal topics on “The Good Wife.” 

He learned how to follow directions exactly and the consequences if he didn’t, how to patiently “hurry up and wait” while waiting for his scene to be shot, and how to roll with last minute changes, like the time he didn’t match the man they cast as his on-screen father on “Blue Bloods” and was downgraded to background at the last second. Many confusing last-minute changes and disappointment really matures a person!

I also can't forget all the auditions where he didn’t get the part. He was invited to audition for the Netflix series, “A Series of Unfortunate Events” and the buildup of being invited by casting and preparing for the audition really made the letdown of not getting a call back hit harder, but he learned how to handle disappointment at an early age.

That “set life” makes a child grow up faster because they are dealing with a more mature environment than most kids their age. As many 9-year-olds were outside riding bikes with their friends, my son was memorizing lines, working on self-tapes for auditions, or actually on set working. So at age 9, for instance, Jesse was already having grown-up sounding conversations, and learning things that some people learn in college or on-the-job as an adult.

I realized that Jesse's mindset was that of someone much older than him when during a break while filming “Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt,” I didn’t see him in the group of other kids in the scene. I asked a production assistant if he knew where he was and he pointed to the back of the room. He was sitting with one of the editors who was doing some color correcting and teaching Jesse, who was super intent on learning. The moral of my story - my son matured faster than I would have expected. 

And for the record, Jesse never had a role as big as any that Brown has had. He did mostly background and indies, with some featured roles mixed in. So, I imagine that she grew up mentally and emotionally even faster.

While Brown is just 19 and Bongiovi is 20, their mentality is likely much older than their actual age. Bongiovi has also been in the public eye with a famous father, so he understands the industry. And while I don’t know them personally, or even that much about them, and my speculation may not be worth two cents, I say let them do what they want without criticism. 

Let’s also look at the celebrity couples who got married at a young age and are still together - Kelly Ripa and Mark Consuelos, David and Victoria Beckham, Sophie Turner and Joe Jonas, Sarah Michelle Gellar and Freddie Prinze, Jr., and let’s not forget Bongiovi’s parents, Jon and Dorothea. 

CONGRATS to the happy couple! My message to them is to ignore the negativity, love the positivity, and live their life together unapologetically.