The rapper is opening up about the heartache of losing his ex unexpectedly in the newest issue of “Essence” magazine.
Appearing on multiple covers of their May issue, Diddy is seen his three daughters in one photo, and the other with all six children. He also gives an emotional retelling of the time when he found out about Kim Porter’s death and the measures he took to make sure the kids heard the news from him first.
“I jumped into mommy mode,” Diddy tells Essence. “I sent people in every direction to try to make sure the kids would not hear about it on social media or the news.”
The mogul shared three kids with Porter — a son, Christian, 21, and 12-year-old twin daughters Jessie James and D’Lila. He also helped raise the late model’s oldest son, 27-year-old Quincy.
“I had to get to the girls’ school and find Quincy, who was on set in Atlanta. Christian was on a plane, and I had his phone disconnected so he wouldn’t read it in the air,” he reveals.
Diddy says there was a lot of “screaming” and “crying,” but he never forgot her last words to him.
“I was crying out to God — and to her — and almost immediately Kim’s voice kicked in, and I could hear her saying, ‘Make sure you take care of my babies.'”
Revealing how this has changed his outlook on life, Diddy adds, “Before this, I was a part-time father, you know? My family was always first, but there are countless times when I chose work over everything else. But every day I can hear her telling me to go and spend some time with the kids and make sure everybody’s all right, like she would do. I’m just a lot more present, and, most important, now my kids come before anything else in my life.”
She was 47 years old.