More Time For You: How Saying No Creates Space for Self-Love!

With February being the month of love and Valentine’s Day right around the corner, it’s a great time to start thinking more about self-love and taking more time to take care of our own mind, body and soul.

Life coach and author Tiffany Cepeda has some surefire ways to kickstart a mindset that supports more self-care into your life without compromising your everyday schedule.

We are probably all guilty of it - not taking enough time for ourselves. So many of us know just what burnout feels like and yet we continue day by day doing the same things and not focusing on specific ways of taking care of ourselves. 

Cepeda, a life coach, author, mental health expert and founder of Mind and Business Life Coaching, has some simple tips to help get our mindset focused on more self-love.

“The biggest thing is just understanding that our body is all encompassing when it comes to our body itself, our mind, our emotions and our outlook and when we neglect self-care, then we have so many different psychological consequences that come like stress and burnout. So, I think getting into the mindset of how can I live the healthiest and be the best version of myself when it comes to having optimal energy and optimal mindset and not feeling like I’m exhausted all the time or living in stress mode 24/7,” she told The Blast exclusively. 

“And just being able to want the best for yourself and thrive instead of being in this mindset of oh here’s another day I just have to survive and get through until Friday. I think that is gonna be the best mindset to begin to have. Understanding that it’s really truly essential for your well-being and your resilience of having the best quality of life overall.” 

Cepeda recommends getting out into nature more often, especially when you start to recognize that you “need to have a break over burnout.” Recognizing that burnout leads to chronic stress and persistent stress can disrupt emotional regulations and how you process things, is an important step.

“Learning to take breaks over burnout is huge. I like to do nature bathing. It sounds kind of funny but you basically spend time in nature without any sort of distractions. Whether you’re hiking in the woods or you walk barefoot on the beach or on the grass, simply walking through a park or maybe sitting on a park bench, somewhere where you are surrounded by nature, trees, getting some sunshine,” she shared. “It actually has been proven to reduce stress hormones, it can lower your blood pressure and it does promote relaxation and it gives you mental clarity. Just being out in nature reduces stress hormones instantly.”

And it doesn’t have to be an all day activity. Even just 20 minutes has been proven to activate healthy chemicals for your brain and body. 

Another thing Cepeda swears by is laughter therapy. 

“We need to laugh more,” she said. “If we laughed more, we would have such a healthier, happier society as a whole.” 

Just watching a comedy, spending time with friends or doing something that makes you happy is good for your mind, body and soul.

We all have our phones in our hands all day long. It’s pretty much unavoidable for so many people of all ages. Replacing some phone time every day with something creative, like art therapy or something else that’s creative and physical, can do wonders.

“It’s such a natural inclination to grab our phones all the time. That actually triggers dopamine to be released everytime you grab your phone. It can almost become an addiction every time you open that phone,” Cepeda explained.

“Putting that phone down and giving your hands something else to do that can operate healthy engagement in your brain and in your body that creates peace versus overstimulation, that is the key.” 

Creating intentional times that you are not on your phone can help make a habit of it. Or even setting an alarm to signify it’s time for some scrolling can start to reprogram the need to stare at your phone all day long. 

It’s easier to start the habits early in life, and those habits will carry into adulthood making self care more of a priority without the struggle. There are a few things that parents can do to help their children.

“The biggest one is self-regulation. I think the biggest part is teaching your kids that it’s okay to feel things but what do we do with those feelings at a young age? When we can learn how to manage our emotions, then as an adult it becomes easier to learn how to manage our stress. It becomes easier to manage mood swings in puberty or we get hormonal changes as we get older,” she said.

“Creating space at the end of each day to talk to your kids about their day. How was your day? What was the highlight of your day and what was upsetting? And then talking through that with them and allowing them space to verbalize how they feel and then asking them, what would you do in that situation or how would you respond. And if they don’t know, then you as the parent have that space and opportunity to create suggestions.”

Practices such as tai chi, yoga and other methods of gentle, simple, mindful movements, can really help with body awareness and achieving relaxation to help you recharge.

“What these movements do is they create body awareness. When we are so into the digital age, where our mind is in so many places, multitasking, it’s overstimulated, it does not give any room for our own body awareness which doesn’t leave room for our emotional awareness or our mental awareness," Cepeda shared.

"The benefits of these somatic movements is to help relax. They really promote relaxation which reduces stress and tension, it also reduces muscle tension, which is usually caused through stress. It improves posture, balance, and helps you be connected with mind, body and soul. Overall, it helps your entire well being.” 

Another great tip Cepeda shared is to try out a sensory deprivation tank session. You basically float in a pod that’s filled with warm, salt water with low light and no sound.

"It basically helps reduce all your sensory overload. It forces your mind into this state of utter calmness," she said. "It relieves stress and anxiety like crazy. It’s one of the biggest, more natural anxiety relief techniques too.”