Actress Tommy Dorfman is getting ready to walk down the aisle once again.
The actress split from her then-husband, Peter Zurkuhlen, earlier in the year after six years of marriage. She revealed months later in an interview with Time that she had been living as a trans woman for almost a year.
Dorfman found love again after her divorce despite having to also adjust to some difficulties in her transition journey. She recently revealed her engagement to her anonymous gay partner and described how her new belle had been a significant help in her new trans life.
Read below for more details.
Tommy Dorfman Confirms Engagement To Mystery Lady
Speaking on an episode of Rachel Bilson’s Broad Ideas podcast, the actress shared that she had gotten engaged to someone. Dorfman kept mute about the name of her partner, albeit addressing her as “just a gay girl” and “the person [she was] going to spend the rest of [her] life with.”
Dorfman portrayed the male character Ryan Shaver in the renowned series 13 Reasons Why. Mid-last year, she came out as transgender both in interviews and on social media, confirming that her pronouns were now “she/her.”
During her discussion with Bilson (via People,) the actress revealed she had issues with being in a relationship since coming out as transgender. She revealed on the podcast that her fiancée was the first woman she’s been with in “a very long time.”
Dorfman disclosed further details about her bond with her belle, describing that being in love fell between being “safe,” “uncomfortable,” and sometimes “painful.” However, she explained that it ultimately felt “very affirming.”
She Fell In Love With Someone ‘Who Doesn’t Fetishize’ Her
Elsewhere in the podcast, Dorfman discussed the pressures of being a transwoman in a world where people who transitioned were still stigmatized. Fortunately for the actress, her anonymous beau had been a breath of fresh air through it all.
“I fell in love with someone who doesn’t fetishize me,” the actress told Bilson, hinting that her partner had no ulterior motives.
Dorfman also revealed that her partner has helped with the medical part of her transition, including helping her take her estrogen shots. She added that even when they are miles apart, her partner still consulted about the process with her.
“My fiancée, she knew how, so she did it for me the first time,” Dorfman added. “Then she was out of town, and we FaceTimed, and she walked me through it.”
Tommy Dorfman Came Out In July
Dorfman’s recent engagement announcement comes after she split from her then-husband Peter Zurkuhlen earlier in the year. The pair’s marriage lasted six years, and they shared no kids during their time together.
After filing for divorce, Dorfman announced her transition in a July 2021 conversation with Time. She told the outlet that she had been “privately identifying and living as a woman” for almost a year before coming out publicly.
She also revealed in the interview why she kept her male name instead of changing it. Dorfman explained that her connection with her demised uncle made her take the decision.
“I’m not changing my name. I’m named after my mom’s brother, who passed a month after I was born, and I feel very connected to that name, to an uncle who held me as he was dying,” she said at the time. “This is an evolution of Tommy. I’m becoming more Tommy.”
Tommy Dorfman Wants To Help Younger Trans People
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Per People, transitioning came with its own difficulties for the actress, who described that the estrogen shots made her feel “emotionally wonky” and gave her “body aches.”
She added: “It’s a second puberty, and I think you’re supposed to go through puberty at an age when you don’t remember it because it hurts.”
Additionally, Dorfman disclosed that she had adopted a more active role in the trans community and within her family. She spoke about her desire to make it simpler for young individuals just starting out on their own gender identity journeys to overcome obstacles.
“Ultimately, I think this isn’t just a trans responsibility but a human responsibility to be of service to the next generation,” Dorfman said. “Now I have trans and nonbinary cousins who are younger than me, but growing up, I only had one queer cousin who was older than me.”
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